Growing up

This parenting business sure isn’t for the faint of heart. As my son makes the transition from baby to toddler (to be fair, he made this transition months ago… I just refuse to accept it) I catch glimpses of his little boy life and it is completely bittersweet. He no longer falls asleep on my chest the way he did when he was a brand new baby and I miss knowing that feeling. Fortunately, my little girl is still in that phase. At 7 weeks, she is doing all of the infant things that I missed the most. Sometimes when I catch these glimpses of a little boy, it catches me so off guard. As if it wasn’t going to happen. But there he is, pushing his construction trucks around the house, trying his best to show us his muscles, and practicing how to jump like a big boy.

Now that we have a newborn, putting my son down for bed is usually my husband’s job since I am with the baby, nursing (my favorite thing, I will save that for another post.) Once in a while, she is content and I can take over the bedtime routine. Sometimes it feels tiring. Rocking, rocking, rocking while he tries his best to fall asleep- but these summer hours just are too bright and exciting for that. But tonight, I didn’t mind the extra time it took us. I gave him a bath, loaded him up with fresh rocket ship pajamas, and read the newest monster book we had chosen at the library this week. He was very sleepy and quiet and I spent these minutes just soaking it all in. Smelling his freshly washed hair, singing my favorite lullaby (yes, a Taylor Swift song), imagining what he will be like in a year, 5 years, 10, and as a grown man. It’s more than a mama’s heart can take to imagine all these things. And so I have to ground myself, focus, and realize his journey has just begun.

Two under two

Having two children under two all day is NO JOKE. They’re funny little kids, and let’s face it- pretty adorable too, but geesh! By 10:00, I feel like I have been up all day and running nonstop! Juggling feedings, diapers, entertaining, naptimes, trips to the store, outfit changes (lots of spit up around here!) is straight up hard work. As I anxiously awaited my husband’s return home, I couldn’t help but turn on cartoons for the last hour, dreaming of the moment I can have a few “me” minutes to recharge.

Here I am, recharging. My husband often scolds me to go upstairs and nap but that’s not the issue at hand. I’m not sleepy, I really need to just put my mind on pause, and engage in something else for a few minutes. Blogging to Bon Iver, that’s just what this mama needs.

If you have any tricks of the trade for two kids, I’d love to hear them!

Favorite parts of the day

Having two children under two (…yeah that baby I wrote about in my first post, she came July 5th, more to come on that!) there are very few moments each day that do not seem to go by in a whirlwind. I always thought this was the case when I had my first child, but did not get a true sense of this feeling until I had my second. One toddler, one newborn. It’s busy.

The days come and go quickly. Between diapers, feedings, naptimes, laundry, cleaning, shushing, swaying, rocking, attempting outings, it’s amazing how fast the days go by. But there are two times of each day that I really savor. The first being early morning.

My toddler was never one of those true early risers, much to my great fortune. 7:00, 7:30 am these are usually the very earliest he wakes for the day. Some days it is closer to 9:00- and who can complain about that? He is a slow riser, much like his father. He enjoys waking, then lying back down then waking, then lounging, until an hour later he finally is up for some toy time. I like this. This extra time in the morning to lounge and lay is a sweet time of our day. The four of us snuggle up in the big bed and have slow and sleepy moments together before facing our new day together. This is only my second favorite time of the day because this one is not a sure thing. Some mornings are crankier, grouchier, earlier, messier, and generally harder.

And so my most favorite time of the day is around 8:00 pm. My toddler goes to sleep, my newborn is in a sleepy, nursing state where she is mostly content to snooze and I can take a few minutes to grab a snack, put my feet up and just breath.

What are your best times of the day? I imagine down the road this 8:00 bedtime will be a crazy time once I try and get TWO bedtime routines up and running. But for now, I will curl up on the couch and let myself just be.

Waiting for baby

As time grows near for baby number two, all sort of preparations begin to seem very important. For instance, I cannot possibly bring another child into this world if I don’t get my car vacuumed out first. What will she think of her mother- crumbs all over the car from the last quick meal she shoveled in? Irrational things like that. Some preparations are more sane and logical- her cosleeper has been washed and outfitted with a sheet, blanket and plenty of burp cloths for those first messy days. Carseat is in the car. Hospital bag, you are my next mission.

Around this time during my first pregnancy, everything was done. And I mean done. His room had received the most attention than any other room in the house, the lucky duck. Clothes were washed, swing was ready, food was stocked. This time? There’s just not enough hours in the day. Or maybe it’s that there is not enough energy in this body. This seems more realistic.

With the first, I remember the strange feeling of not knowing. The feeling that I might wake up, as I do every other day, go about my normal business and by the end of the day- it could be baby time and lives officially changed. I could be using my precious and little time to get ready poking around the internet and then start going in to labor. Wouldn’t I be wishing I had gotten that hospital bag packed first.